It such a simple word but it has such deep meaning. When faced with obstacles it can seem as though you are in a fog. I was in a fog as well, but in my case, it was for a long time as it related to certain relationships. Some of which likely were unclear to me – perhaps due to the fact that I always give the benefit of doubt. This particular relationship was not of a boyfriend and girlfriend type but more of a familiar friendship that was to last the test of time.

I learned that sometimes some events occur that can bring so much clarity you feel that maybe you were the one with rose-colored glasses on. The cliché that ‘actions speak louder than words’ holds really true for me in this case. I learned that it is not time that determines the strength of a friendship but it is matters of the heart.

I learned that no matter how much kindness you bring into a friendship or even loyalty the receiving party may not even appreciate it. However, this does not stop me from unconditional love and support for those that are around me.

I learned that the truth can be in your face but you have to stop making excuses and come to terms with it. Forgiveness may take time but it eventually happens. It does not mean that the person that hurt you is going to get away with causing you pain. It just means that you have come to terms with it and letting go helps you to move onto better and healthier relationships.

I learned that you can hold a friend’s many secrets and be the ever confidante but that does not mean that this friend will care to appreciate it. But that does not coerce me to reveal those secrets, as they are not mine to tell. That is a person of character and one who is loyal despite what occurs in a relationship.

I learned that you couldn’t pick your family but that is why we have the freedom to pick our friends. Some extended family members may not watch out for your best interests, but that does not mean that you cannot watch out for yourself. Surround yourself with people who love you and will stand by you in your time of need.

I learned that in spite of facing adversities you could have faith that things will work out for the best. A wise friend lent me one of her all time favorite quotes by Seneca that put things into perspective for me. It is true that ‘time heals what reason cannot’ – Seneca.

After all is said and done I have never felt so free in a long time. It is time to stop blaming yourself and to really focus on what matters. Let go of things that do not matter and realize that things will workout for the best. The eternal optimist in me believes in this as it has yet to fail me.